


Im Proud Of You Kiddo

by Gaybrand



Series: one offs/short stories [3]
Category: Tribe Twelve
Genre: Homophobia, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Update: milos gay actually, coming out but its fucked up i suppose, familial/brotherly love, milo doesnt have a sexuality i guess but hes not straight so dont think that, obv theyrer fuckin cousins so like...nothing gross
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-06
Updated: 2018-08-06
Packaged: 2019-06-23 01:49:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,926
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15595554
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gaybrand/pseuds/Gaybrand
Summary: Noah comes for a visit, things dont go well.





	Im Proud Of You Kiddo

**Author's Note:**

> a theory/headcannon for Noah coming out to Milo, but from Milo's pov [bc i dont write for Milo like ever and i wanted to try it jdcdsjkn]

Sometimes milo wondered if noah had forgotten it. He'd been maybe thirteen at the time but it seemed like such a prominent thing to happen to a kid who'd had such nice parents his whole life. He never mentioned it, or acted like he remembered, and milo really didn't want to bring it up.

Milo, about sixteen, couldn't exactly relate to having parents who cared about him, or even in reality, were nice to him. Mary hardly qualified as a mother and most of his “dads” through the years meant very little if anything to him an often he was happy to see them go.

In some ways he tried to live through his younger cousin. 

Noah had come to visit for a short time, he was still quite a bit smaller than milo and while they weren't that far apart in age he still seemed like a kid. Perhaps part of it was that milo was midway through high school and noah hadnt started yet. Noah was shy and generally somewhat quiet when he didn't have something to interject with someone he knew well, it was remarkable how much he opened up when they were alone in comparison to how he'd talk even around his parents. He seemed to realize he was a little awkward at times, though milo never minded. Milo was just old enough now to notice noah being more withdrawn and anxious as he grew older, but not quite old enough to figure out why on his own. 

However, in the beginning of this particular visit noah was just as outgoing around milo as he ever was. His mom didn't want anything to do with Mary and therefore didn't stick around but milo had assured them he'd keep an eye on noah, who'd so anxiously asked if he could stay and hang out with him during the visit, and they'd be alright on their own. Sharon seeme to trust milo better than she trusted her own sister and had let noah stay, though shed looked a bit anxious herself. 

It had been a normal uneventful visit, though pleasant as far as milo was aware, they'd just been talking with soft music playing in the background and noah had just left to go get something to drink while milo tried yet again to find some music they could agree on. (noah at the time had a somewhat embarrassing phase of really enjoying shitty rap music unironically). Noah came back into his room but he kept looking back at the door nervously and had stopped talking much. 

“You good?” milo asked him seeing how quiet he was suddenly. 

“Uhm...it's nothing really..”

“You can tell me man.”

“Well it's just that….Your mom kinda scares me..” noah admitted quietly. Milo somewhat noted that he didn't refer to mary as his aunt, and really who would want to be related to her if they could help it.

“Hey kiddo don't worry about it too much she can't really do anything to ya.” milo said ruffling noah's hair. God how he would regret such a lie, but the soft reassured smile on his younger cousins face had seemed to put the issue to bed at the time.

As when anyone was over, which was rarely, they kept to milos room and everything seemed to be fine. Noah was very creative and entertaining if a bit odd and milo liked to hear him ramble on and on about obscure and seemingly random things he happened to know alot about. Noah didn't seem to have many friends back home and spent most of his free time at the library evidently. Milo found his cousin endearing. 

Noah mumbled something about being hungry a few hours later and getting something to eat, milo hadn't felt like eating the past couple days (though he didn't mention that to noah) and simply shrugged.

“There might be something in there, you can check.” he said nonchalantly, admittedly not paying much attention to just how nervous noah looked. He stood somewhat awkwardly in the doorway popping the joints in his hands as though he was trying to work up the courage to say or do something. He seemed however to give up.

“Yeah uh i'll be right back..” noah mumbled turning out of the room. Milo half waved as he left and didn't think anything of it until it had been a handful of minutes, and noah had not come back. Still he tried to think that he was just being paranoid, though he listened intently for any sounds.

He heard what sounded like shattering glass and yelling and immediately was on his feet and out of the room, silently cursing himself out for leaving noah alone with his mother. He found them both in the kitchen, mary towering over the smaller boy her hand raised menacingly. She seemed not to see milo and kept muttering insulting things in the boys face, the splintered remains of a mug were scattered all over the floor. She didn't seem to be doing anything herself yet noah was clutching a red mark on his face, absolutely terrified in his expression, which told milo everything he needed to know. He shoved his way in between them shielding noah with his body, though he was sure mary would try and hurt him again and he couldn't be here.

“Go outside.” milo told him struggling to keep his voice calm so he wouldn't scare the poor kid more. “Don't worry about it just wait out there.” 

He couldn't see much besides noah scampering off to the door out of the corner of his eye, he felt much better when the door had closed behind him.much better for noah's sake anyway, as the real problem still stood in front of him. He'd grown taller than his mother though she retained her aura of threatening malice she had when he'd pissed her off somehow, she didn't seem to care about whatshed allegedly done to her nephew, only that milo was in her way again and she was furious about it. 

He'd had many arguments with his mother, many of those ended in them throwing things and yelling as well, yet this time it was different. Perhaps because it had been noah who'd been hurt instead of milo. Her treating him badly enraged milo and he didn't hold back from telling her, in no uncertain terms, that she was a piece of shit. 

“Fuck this and fuck you.” he finished eventually storming off and not bothering to stay and listen to the last thing she retaliated with, he slammed the screen door behind him

Noah was sitting on the step, covering his head an clearly shaking. Milo took a moment to try and calm down, his throat was sore from yelling, in the sudden quiet all he could hear was his own breathing, and noah very light sobbing.

“Hey kiddo, uh..shit.” milo really didn't know what to say or how to handle this, especially because noah flinched when he spoke, he seemed like he was having a panic attack and milo didn't know what to do but feel guilty for letting him come here and telling him things would be ok. He sat down on the step next to him, quiet for another few moments.

“Listen i'm...sorry i didn't think she'd ever do anything to you, especially like that since you aren't her actual kid, and that was pretty ignorant.” milo sighed, wondering if it would be appropriate to hug him, he wasn't well versed in physical affection or comfort. 

Noah shook his head, not looking up and seeming unable to speak, but he still shook his head in what milo interpreted as disagreement. 

“Look noah….i shouldn't have left you alone with her and that's that.” he restated firmly. Noah shook his head again and milo had to try not to be annoyed with him. “It doesn't matter right now i guess.” he sighed again and pulled out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. 

Noah didn't seem to be calming down and just sitting still was driving him nuts, mostly with guilt, he tried and tried to think of anything he could do for him.

“Hey let's go see kevin.” he offered knowing kevin was much better at handling something like this and that perhaps getting away from the house would help. To his relief noah nodded after a short pause and looked up slightly. He still looked almost terrified, he probably had never had an adult hurt him before, especially not someone as intense and somewhat crazy as mary. While it was only a slight mark it hurt to see it on such a small, helpless looking kid. 

“C'mon buddy.” he offered his hand out and noah hesitantly took it, clinging to his arm and looking downwards as though he were ashamed. Milo led him away from his house and towards kevins, as he only lived a few blocks away. Noah was quiet the whole walk there besides light sniffling and kept flinching when he saw things out of the corner of his eyes. His grip on milos arm was ironclad. Milo was almost grateful when they finally got to kevin's house.

Almost being the key word.

He was glad that kevin had been the one to answer the door, at first, he didn't want to have to explain an extremely distressed thirteen year old to kevin's mother. 

“Hey guys i wondered if you still liked me,” kevin started to joke but stopped upon seeing noah's expression. “ what's wrong? What happened?”

“Can we go inside before we talk about it.” milo asked trying not to seem suspicious.

“I mean yeah- oh what happened to his face..” kevin murmured suddenly worried

“We should really be alone before we talk about it.” milo insisted somewhat intensely. 

“Right right.’ kevin led them through his house looking around presumably for adults and locked his door when they got to his room. Kevin turned his attention immediately to noah looking over his injury. “It doesn't look too bad i suppose but what…”

“My fucking mom..” milo started rubbing his temples and sitting down to explain.

Kevin held noah in his lap, rocking him slightly and growing more and more pissed as milo explained. Noah still remained silent but started crying quietly again at some point. Kevin kept gently wiping away tears and petting his head protectively.

“Did she hit you?” kevin asked him softly when milo was done explaining all he knew. Noah looked incredibly guilty and didn't answer one way or another. “Noah honey it's ok but i want you to tell us. Did she hit you?”

Noah very gently nodded.

Milo might have assumed that from the beginning but still having it confirmed mixed with noah's expression that rivaled that of a beaten puppy triggered a wave of shame and guilt in him. 

They stayed with kevin for a few hours, keeping quiet and as calm as possible. Noah didn't say anything and milo couldn't think of what else to say, apologizing just didn't seem to be enough. Kevin kept mumbling incoherently to himself and looked furious.

“horrid fucking cunt.” kevin muttered and milo shook his head taken aback and initially unsure if he'd heard him right. 

“Damn… i mean you're right but...shit dude i've never heard you say..”

“You can't bring him back there.” kevin interrupted him sternly. 

“Well”

“You can't. Not after this you shouldn't even go back there. I'm serious dude.” kevin insisted looking over at noah who was laying down, possibly asleep, a few feet away.

“Yeah… i know that was stupid to fuckin bring him there…” milo muttered standing and beginning pacing around the room.

“It's not your fault..it's just not safe..” kevin said quietly. 

“You're not going to tell your mom are you?” milo asked, he knew the answer when it was just him being affected but now….

“I...i guess not..” kevin mumbled sounding miserable. “But i will if this happens again...to noah i mean since...i promised you..” 

“Thats fair. Thanks.” milo sighed looking on sadly at noah's small frame curled up on the floor.

When they had to leave kevin's house, as he didn't want to get in trouble for inviting people inside when his parents were out, and neither of them understandably really wanted to go back to milos, he suggested getting something to eat. Noah was mostly calm now or at least seemed to be which made milo feel just a little better, though he still seemed troubled.

Noah poked at his food and stared out the window at different intervals. He seemed to have something still bothering him but didn't want to talk about it and ultimately was trying not to. Milo knew his cousin too well to pretend noah was ok although to someone else he might have seemed so.

“Whats on your mind kiddo.” he prompted hoping to get noah to talk to him even if he wasn't all that great with words.

“I..uhm..” noah mumbled, he didn't make eye contact with milo at all and kept playing with his fork, it was almost like he was hiding something he was ashamed of.” it's not important really’”

“C'mon you know i don't play that game dude just tell me.” 

“It was just...your mom...not a big deal…” noah kept his head down and his voice barely audible. 

“Did she say something to you?” milo tried to sound calm and not like he wanted to march back home and fight his mom again.

“She just called me some names..i hear it all the time anyway…”

“What did she say exactly.” milo insisted. 

“Fine. she called me a fag alright.” noah snapped taking milo aback, he'd never hear him get mouthy to anyone's face before, only when they weren't listening. Though he couldn't blame noah for being upset. “She called me a fag and told me no one was ever gonna care about me and she hated having me in her house. happy now.” he looked more upset than actually angry. 

“I'm...sorry…” milo shifted in his seat, despite having heard her call kevin the same and worse, he still hadn't considered that she’d do it to noah. 

“Forget it man.” noah muttered bending his straw so it was nearly useless. “She's right i guess so…”

“No she's not man don't let her bullshit get into your head.”

“Me being a fag isn't bullshit….” noah said it extremely quietly, his face flushed and milo could see his eyes watering. He didn't understand what noah was getting at for a moment until suddenly it just clicked.

“Noah are you saying…” milo cleared his throat trying to figure out what to say. It had not been entirely unexpected (if any of his cousins were gay it would have always been noah) and yet he had no idea how to respond now, in such an uncomfortable situation where he was forcibly outed. “Look man it's...not a huge deal if you are it's just...you being you .”

Noah looked up at him slightly as though shocked milo wasn't angry. 

“You don't….hate me? 

“No dude i'm not my fuckin mom. Nothings gonna make me hate you, especially not this.” he insisted as kindly as he could. “Look man i don't want you to ever think this is something to be ashamed of especially when people like my mom try to make you feel like it is. I want you to be proud of yourself cus i'm proud of you.” milo hadn't realized how strangely passionate he'd gotten til he finished and noticed noah looking absolutely speechless. 

“You really think that?” he eventually said, there were the beginnings of tears in his eyes but he looked more relieved than upset, as if milo had just lifted a huge weight of his shoulders , milo realized just a second later, he had.

“Noah.” milo took a deep breath. “ look man, i love you alright? I'm always gonna be here for ya.” 

Noah's eyes seemed to fill with tears again but he wiped them away quickly and leaned forward to hug milo, who patted his head a little awkwardly.

“I love you too…” 

“Hey let's not get too mushy, i know it's alabama but..” milo tried to joke after a few minutes of just hugging, he was relieved when noah laughed a little and wiped his eyes.

“Gross man..” noah still looked a little sad but at the very least he was smiling. Milo watched him closely as they wandered the town til his parents came to pick him up again. He looked at such a small kid already having to deal with shit, and remembered that noah was such a sweet hopeful little boy who didn't understand that many people are cruel to people like him that have a nieve kindness about them. It almost broke his heart that people would hurt him and he could do nothing about it. 

Noah never spoke of it, never even mentioned the unfortunate coming out conversation after, logically milo wanted to assume he just didn't wanna think about it but part of him wondered if he even remembered it sometimes. He never made any indication that their conversation in the small diner had ever happened and sometimes he even acted as though milo didn't know. He hated the thought that his cousin didn't believe he had anyone to turn to.

He regretted not telling him how much he cared often enough.


End file.
